When men cheat:
reasons and positive effects
What I love as an independent escort besides sex? Getting more insight into the minds and souls of men. I know what makes them tick and have learned through my job how different men and women actually are and function.
Most of my clients are in relationships or even married, but still long for an adventure with me. Why is that? There are several reasons:
1. Infidelity due to rejection or neglect in the relationship or marriage
The great thing about being an escort without an agency is that my clients can contact me directly and communicate with me in advance. I love getting to know different types of men and getting involved with them. On all levels. This enriches my existence a lot.
I usually find out in advance or at the latest in conversations during our date that some men are not happy in their relationships.
Lack of love, rejection or neglect cause them to seek physical closeness and emotional attention from me. This includes desires for contact, for a conversation partner, for tenderness: men want to be with someone, to open their hearts, to talk about problems or their own interests for which their own partner does not have an open ear.
Men want one thing above all (besides sex, of course): To be heard. Men want to be listened to. That you notice what they have to say. And that interests me because it broadens my own horizons.
Sexual frustrations are also part of rejection or neglect because one's wife doesn't want sex or is emotionally distant. Yet the need for closeness is simply human.
2. Desire for variety & sexual desires
Men are hunters and it is in their nature to seek adventure. Often men come to me who want to experience something new, who are looking for a thrill. Who are bored sexually.
Monotony and lack of variety cause them to throw themselves into an escort adventure - discreetly, without obligations or protracted courtship. Many men would like to feel more potent and desired. Experience passion that has fallen asleep in their own marriage or relationship.
Often men feel trapped and powerless in such partnerships. They often persevere for years in relationships where nothing works in bed. At some point, instead of spending their nights alone with porn, they want to feel the excitement of a living woman again. To experience something. Make up for all the missed opportunities. And for that they are at the right address with me, because I enjoy sex and like to throw myself into adventure.
3. Infidelity because of sexual desires and preferences that are not fulfilled in the partnership
If the sex life in their marriage or partnership does not correspond to their wishes and ideas, men like to look elsewhere. Perhaps a man would like to try anal sex, but his partner is not ready for it? Or he loves extended blowjobs and deep throat, but she doesn't like it at all? Porn may help for a while, but at some point men want to experience these fantasies.
For most men, cheating has nothing to do with a lack of love for their own wife or girlfriend, but is a rational decision to satisfy their own needs. Then they come to me because they do not want to risk their marriage. With an escort girl, the erotic encounter remains non-binding, safe, discreet. The fixed setting also makes it feel less like cheating for many.
4. Cheating because they are afraid or ashamed to talk about their sexual needs
What I have learned about men as an escort is that they are not good at communicating. They often don't know how to talk to their partner about their needs and sexual desires. How to implement them and integrate them into the relationship.
Often lack of sex in marriage is only a symptom, the real reason lies much deeper and usually goes along with a lack of exchange in the partnership. Sometimes men are also downright afraid to share erotic fantasies with their partner.
Maybe because they think they are too kinky or dirty, so that they have a guilty conscience or don't want to offend their own wife or girlfriend or be judged themselves. Then the date with an escort girl is the uncomplicated way, because everything takes place discreetly in a fixed setting and they get the confirmation from me that they are not wrong or their sexual desires are strange.
5. Men cheat to save their partnership
I admit, this point sounds paradoxical in a way and yet it is true. Men often cheat to save their love. Men love their partners but don't know how to deal with relationship problems.
They want to feel emotionally and sexually reconnected and hope that cheating will make them see their partner in a new way. They cheat to fill gaps (and to get their own needs fulfilled without pushing or being too demanding on their own wife or girlfriend).
Men think that another woman will make their unfulfilled desires disappear so that they can then live happily with their own partner again.
6. Infidelity due to lack of sexual attraction to the partner / lack of libido
I have met quite a few men who are no longer as sexually attracted to their own wife or partner as they were at the beginning. That's obvious. In a relationship or marriage, both partners change, grow, develop. Often also physically.
Pregnancy, work, stress, beer belly. Sometimes one partner lets himself go more than the other. If you only watch each other changing nappies, cleaning, cooking or brushing your teeth every day, you can lose sexual interest. So men look for someone who can revive their sexual virility.
7. Build self-worth through an escort experience
Men often come to me with a lack of self-confidence. They either believe they can't find suitable (sex) partners on the open market or experience too little appreciation and affirmation in their own relationship.
Most of the time, these men have no reason to hide. Because apart from their self-doubt or introversion, they are wonderful, dapper appearances who open up after a while.
As an escort girl, I see it as my job to give them a bit of reassurance and to encourage them in their own masculinity. They learn through me that they are very desirable and it makes me happy to feel their warmth, to have conversations and to get physically close to them. The idea is that we both leave our date with a good feeling and that we each take something enriching away with us.
Why a fling with an escort can have a positive effect on a marriage or a relationship
Those who decide to cheat usually don't do it for no reason, but are trying to fill emptiness. As an escort, it is my job to encourage men in their own sexuality.
Unlike with an affair, men enter into a connection with escort ladies in a safe setting. The risk of falling in love is low. It is not about deep emotional connections that could endanger a partnership. Instead, an escort date offers the opportunity to develop and act out freely, with set limits, rules and guidelines.
An escort date can have a positive effect on a marriage or relationship because:
Cheating removes emotional uncertainties: Pangs of conscience after the fling show that a man still loves his partner and is afraid of losing her
A fling with an escort lady can give a new horizon to a relationship that has fallen asleep
Cheating brings a breath of fresh air - according to studies, a fling increases creative power and resourcefulness
A man feels strengthened in his own potency, masculinity and charisma, which in turn reflects positively on his partner
Men can explore their sexual fantasies and desires in a safe environment without upsetting, harassing or upsetting their partner
Men who cheat have more desire for sex in their own relationship, as a fling is often a wake-up call for the libido
Men often see their partners in a different light after a fling with an escort girl
I, as an escort, give new impulses, not only sexually, but also on a spiritual level
Men often have much more clarity after cheating, start to reflect, learn what they want and need
Even if cheating is criminally disregarded in our society (of course, open communication of needs would be better than cheating on one's partner), one cannot disregard the fact that a fling happens for certain reasons and can have positive effects or represent an opportunity for the relationship. In the end, we are all human beings with longings, dreams and desires. Nobody is infallible - that's what makes us human...😉
Independent Escort Lady from Munich